By: Gus Victoria
The past week has been quite important for millions of gay people in this country and the many millions more that proudly call themselves friends and are family to them. The great joy in the Supreme Court’s decision to deem Section 3 of the Defense of Marriage Act unconstitutional was palpable. Sometimes it takes great moments like this to realize simultaneously how far we have come and how far we have yet to go. A victory, even one such as this, should not distract us from the still sad reality that for many people, in many states, the ruling did very little if anything at all. Also it cannot easily bridge the gap caused by those who with either ignorance or hate choose to deny to some of their fellow citizens a natural and just right; the freedom to love and profess through mutual lifelong commitment that love regardless of sex.
Those who would redefine marriage do so without an understanding of what marriage is and a depressingly active trivializing of love. To cite God and a sacred scripture as the grounds for that action is wrong on several levels. Firstly it blatantly shows a willfully malicious and selective reading of holy texts. Secondly, it disregards the very clear principle of separation of Church and State that this country was founded upon. Third, and to me, most tragic, it dehumanizes those it seeks to control by labeling them sinners and not acknowledging a very real love.
Love is ancient. It is the fabric of human nature that binds us all to each other and beauty. The divine essence is love and we all carry it within ourselves. From this fount springs forth compassion, empathy, joy, hope, and faith. No one is born with hate in their hearts. Hate is learned. Hate is not the opposite force of love. Hate does not oppose love. Hate inhabits an empty house. It can only be sown where love is not. There it grows if allowed to, if fed more hate. Until of course, inevitably, it becomes a force unto itself. Even then, a true love that delivers in its light understanding can banish the darkness cast by hate.
Marriage, as those behind such an oppressive act of government want it to be understood, is fairly recent and it has nothing to do with love. A marriage in that regard is a simple legal contract. It was created for purposes of inheritance and politics. Its purpose was financial and political. Love rarely if ever figured. If marriage then, taken in that context of a legal contract, is such then there can be no question as to its legality between same-sex couples. Religion plays no part and to deny such legal protection to one portion of the citizenry is against both the laws and principles this country was founded upon.
If Biblical scripture is used to define by some argument of precedent or natural law that such a union must be between one man and one woman it ignores much. It chooses a few passages throughout the entire work while ignoring many other laws deemed unnecessary, inconvenient, or outdated. Also it chooses to focus, with detrimental effect, on a tiny portion while missing the entirety of the message contained in the rest of the work; that love prevails above all. Adherents can love, but if someone chooses to love someone of the same sex, no matter how sincere that affection may be, they are by necessity and without argument wrong. I must allow myself to be wrong for how can I learn and grow if I know everything already? Yet, even in those things I feel right about, I cannot allow myself to use that conviction to deny others their rights. Truth stands on its own and demands no further defense.
It is faith in that truth that must ground our convictions. That indeed love will prevail and those that seek to stop two men from marrying, or two women, will inevitably lose. That marriage will be redefined from its imperfect birth as a cynical legal contract to that which it has always been destined to be; an outward manifestation of an inner truth to be celebrated by those friends and family of the happy couple.
As we celebrate Pride this day and every day. As we mourn those whose lives have been cut short by the depression and weight of unacceptance. As we look to a brighter future let us not lose sight that it does get better. It WILL get better, if only we let love guide us. Hate imprisons most harshly he that originates it. Spread love and be free!
